Research shows that healthy and supportive relationships can reduce
stress and improve your overall health and sense of well-being. However,
all relationships are not equally supportive. Building a network of
supportive friends, or even just one supportive relationship can be
vital to your well being. Some skills that can help you to
build relationships with people that are truly supportive and
sustaining are-
Meeting People
The more people you have in your life, the more likely you are to have truly supportive relationships with at least one of them. It’s beneficial to be able to regularly add new people to your circle. Here are some good ways to meet people
.
Assertiveness
People often think of assertiveness
as ‘standing up for yourself’ and ‘not letting people push you around’ –
basically the alternative to passivity. While this is mostly true,
assertiveness is also the alternative to aggressiveness, a way of
handling people where you get your needs met at the expense of others’
needs. Developing the skill of assertiveness
can really help you strengthen your relationships, making them mutually
supportive, lasting and opening the lines of communication.
Listening to Your Friends
When we’ve had a hard day, sometimes being able to talk to a friend
about our feelings is all it takes to turn things around and make stress
a feeling of connection and well-being. Being truly listened to and
understood can have profound effects on us. When dealing with friends,
it’s important to give as well as receive this supportive type
of listening when support is truly needed. Here are some things to
remember when friends are talking about things that stress or upset
them:
- Ask them about their feelings, and listen.
- Reflect back what you hear, so they know you really understand.
- Instead of always trying to tie the conversation back to your experiences, focus questions on them and their feelings.
Listening to Your Intuition
Some people give off positive energy
that makes us feel good, and others give off negative energy that
drains us. If you pay attention to the signals that your intuition sends
you and act on those signals, you’ll have a healthier social circle.
Here are some questions to ask yourself:
Not everyone is an appropriate match. If there’s someone in your life
who makes you feel bad about yourself, doesn’t share any of your
interests or values, or is someone that you just don’t mesh well with,
it’s perfectly acceptable to put that relationship on the back burner.
- Does the conversation flow easily, or is it forced?
- Do you feel they truly understand, accept and support you?
- Do you feel you truly understand, accept and support them?
- Do you feel better or worse about yourself when you’re with them?
But it is important to have several people you can count on for support in your life.
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